Thor and Jane Get Two Variants and Malekith Gets Two Masks; Tyler Perry’s Madea Is a Real Nutcracker; All Is Bright Has Paul Giamatti and Paul Rudd as Fighting Canadian Xmas Tree Salesmen; Machete Kills Has Fiery Titties, Explosives and Charlie Sheen as the President; Plus In the Name of and Gabrielle

Posted: September 6, 2013 in Movies

 

Thor Blue VariantThor International One Sheet

 

The folks over at Marvel love Thor (Chris Hemsworth) and Jane Foster (Natalie Portman) so much that they  came out with a blue and gold variants of their Thor: The Dark World cast poster for different markets.

The blue variant is the U.K. version.  It leans toward showing futuristic buildings, none of them recognizably British landmarks, with laser bullets streaking through and blast clouds rising up.  The British can stomach destruction of other countries but can’t see theirs put to the torch.

The gold variant is the International version.  The Brits and the other countries share in the destruction of their architectural heritage and can only watch helplessly as ash and embers rain down.

The producer of all this destruction is presumably Malekith (Christopher Eccleston,  the ninth Dr. Who), the ruler of  Svartalfheimhe the home of  The Dark World of the title and the commander of the Dark Elves.  Malekith and his warring minions wear masks as part of their battle regalia.  Malekith wears an extra reserve mask, that in the poster (below), is half-burnt.

What made Malekith pissed off enough to attack both Asgard (Thor’s celestial home) and earth will have to wait for the movie to unveil.

The U.K and the rest of the world get Thor: The Dark World October 30th, the U.S. one week later on November 8th.

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madea_christmas

Tyler Perry’s Madea the world’s most famous and funniest ballbuster gets a “Nutcracker transformation in the first poster for A Madea Christmas.

Tyler again produces, writes, directs and stars in this story about how “Madea gets coaxed into helping a friend pay her daughter a surprise visit in the country for Christmas, but the biggest surprise is what they’ll find when they arrive.”  Via IMDB.

Chad Michael Murray,  Tika Sumpter, Alicia Witt, Eric Lively and Kathy Najimy get to help spread the Madea brand of holiday spirit.

A Madea Christmas opens December 17th.  See it with the nutcracker you love,  after you get your Christmas shopping done.

 

all_is_bright

My guess for the crossed out word in red in the poster for All Is Bright  is “bought” or “blight”.

The two Paulies- Giamatti and Rudd star in this story about two French Canadian Christmas tree salesmen who  travel to New York to sell trees. What else would they be selling?

This Bad Santa inspired movie was directed by Phil Morrison (June Bug) and also stars Sally Hawkins (Blue Jamine), Amy Landecker and Marvin Spector (Boardwalk Empire).

All Is Bright” made its premiere earlier this spring at the Tribeca Film Festival (under the title “Almost Christmas“) and will be released on VOD on Sept. 10 followed by a theatrical release on Oct. 4.

 

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Latent sexual symbols run amok in the newest cast poster for Machete Kills

That’s Danny Trejo wielding the sexually suggestive machetes that slice up and into Sofia Vergara  with her heavy breast armory that features automatic rapid fire action and Michelle Rodriguez  wearing a Snake Pilssken eye patch and strategically placed for action big bang boom artillery.  Alex Vega as Killjoy flashes some leg and a three pronged Bowie knife with multiple attachments.  Lady Gaga crowds the edges as the siren La Chameleon. 

Mel Gibson gets to be the villainous Mexican drug lord that Trejo must stop before he can launch a weapon into space.  But first he must get through Mendez the Madman “Demian Bichir”.  Charlie Sheen is the POTUS who sends Machete on his suicide mission. 

Robert Rodriguez, going back to his action mashup roots, directs all the carnage. 

 

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Malgorzata Szumowska (Elles) directed and wrote In the Name Of.  The film explores homosexuality in the Catholic Church through the eyes of Priest Adam (Andrzej Chyra) and his object of temptation and desire (Mateusz Kosciukiewicz).

gabrielleFrom IMDB:  Gabrielle (Gabrielle Marion-Rivard) is a young woman with Williams syndrome who has a contagious joie de vivre and an exceptional musical gift. Since she met her boyfriend Martin (Vincent-Guillaume Otis), at the recreation centre where they are choir members, they have been inseparable. However, because they are “different,” their loved ones are fearful of their relationship. As the choir prepare for an important music festival, Gabrielle does everything she can to gain her independence. As determined as she is, Gabrielle must still confront other people’s prejudices as well as her own limitations in the hope of experiencing a love far from the “ordinary”.

Lousie Archimbault wrote and directed. 

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